The Pilgrims enjoyed that first Thanksgiving meal after going through a very rough time. If this is your first Thanksgiving after a divorce, you can relate. It may not feel like much to celebrate, but with the right mindset, you can focus on food and football and skip the friction.

Here’s how.

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Put It in Writing

If you’re swapping days or adjusting the schedule, make sure it’s in writing. A text or an email is enough. Don’t rely on “we’ll just work it out.” That phrase has ruined more holidays than dry turkey.

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Do Not Turn It Into a Tug-of-War

Kids may not mind two plates of turkey, but they do mind being shuttled back and forth all day just so each parent can “win” the holiday. The day should feel like Thanksgiving, not like a relay race. Work out a schedule that puts your child’s comfort ahead of your scoreboard.

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Use Common Sense with Travel

If traffic, weather, or flight delays are in play, be flexible. Judges notice when parents work together and they remember when parents act unreasonable. The holiday isn’t ruined if a visit starts late.

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New Partners? Keep It Smooth

If you’re planning to bring someone new into the mix, give the other parent a heads-up. Surprises are for pumpkin pie, not for showing up with a plus-one nobody expected.

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Remember What the Holiday Is Really About

This day is not about winning the calendar. It is about your kids feeling loved, safe, and included. They will not remember whether the parenting plan said “alternate years.” They will remember whether they felt caught in the middle.

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Lawyer Bill’s Advice

Thanksgiving should not look like a courtroom dressed up with cranberry sauce. Be flexible, put it in writing, and remember the goal is happy kids, not a perfect schedule. Handle the holiday with some common sense and you’ll have a lot more to be thankful for.

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