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I am going to say something that surprises a lot of people.

I do not think divorce should be your first move.

Barring physical abuse, serious drug use, habitual drunkenness, or adultery, I think you owe it to yourself, and to your kids if you have them, to actually give your marriage a real shot before you ever step into a courtroom.

Not lip service.

Not “we tried for two weeks.”

Not “we went to one counseling session and it was awkward.”

A real, honest effort.

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Divorce is permanent.

Court orders last for years.

Some of them last forever.

And once you file, a lot of doors quietly close behind you.

Not emotionally.

Legally.

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This is why I am such a believer in things that actually help people reconnect, including books like The Five Love Languages. Those ideas are not fluff. They teach people how to speak to each other in ways that actually land.

They will not fix everything.

But they might fix enough.

And if they do, you will be glad you slowed down.

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Here is the part that matters.

If you do everything you can, and it still does not work, you will walk into your divorce stronger, clearer, and more at peace with your decision. You will not be guessing. You will not be wondering. You will know you did not quit too soon.

That matters more than people realize.

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Lawyer Bill’s Advice

Try before you file.

Because once you file, you cannot un-ring that bell.

And if you are going to change the entire course of your life, you deserve the confidence of knowing you truly gave it your best shot.